Discipline at home

As a parent you have to understand that discipline starts at home. Your children look to you for guidance and direction, you are the voice that counts. It is not fair to expect teachers to instill a strong sense of discipline in your children. They are simply there to reinforce the discipline ideals taught at home.

Children have to be taught that rules are important and that they have to be followed. As a parent you can start by making you child understand, respect and follow all figures of authority in their lives. Your authority is important, you must not blur the lines of parent and friend with your child. They need to understand that they can trust you with important information but that ultimately you are the parent.

Teachers can easily pin point those learners who have no discipline at home because these are the unruly ones in the classroom. These children do not understand that their behaviour disturbs other children. As a parent you must do all you can to ensure that you are not enabling your child with the wrong kind of freedom that will become a problem at school.

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Your role as a parent in your child's learning process

As a parent you have to be involved in your child's learning experience. Be aware of what your child is being taught in school. This can only be achieved by talking to your child and attending school meetings. Make sure you are taking the time to go through your child's school books. This will also assist you in knowing where your child is struggling so you can take steps in getting the appropriate assistance for your child.

Being a parent usually means your life is hectic between kids, work and running your household successfully but this can never mean that you should not fulfill your role as the primary educator in your child's life. As most parents know, it's not enough to simply buy toys, you have to invest in educational experiences and material for children to engage with. Purchase educational games that you can play with your children, this is a great way for you to spend time with your kids and be active in their learning process. When you spend quality time with your children why not spend it at the museum, or visiting an important heritage site or even walking in a historical section of town? All of this can be important learning experiences.

There is no excuse for a lack of parental involvement. As a parent it is your responsibility to know everything about your child, if you are not happy with what you know take the necessary steps to rectify the problem. Make sure you know your children's teachers and the progress you child is making.

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Prepare your children for the world

When we talk about loving our children, loving them means preparing them to stand on their own feet.

Out there in the real world, your children will have to pull their own weight and make their own way. If you set your standards for them low, they will achieve those low standards, and they won't grow. It is important for your children to learn self-sufficiency, develop high self-esteem and be motivated early on in life.

If you are constantly helping them with their daily chores, their homework or taking care of all their needs, you are in fact crippling them. It's not fair to them to enable them for most of their teenage years then all of a sudden just put them on the street so to speak. You have created the problem. There's got to be a plan. There's got to be a transition.

Make sure you are communicating with your children and sharing your mistakes and solutions with them. It is important to instill a sense of responsibility in them by giving them tasks to complete and foster independence by asking for their input.

Very important is to give them good financial skills. It is never too early to start, when they are in primary school give your children chores so that they can earn what they want, and teach them about saving.

All you can do as a parent is prepare your children to the best of your ability. Make sure you do not pressure them into living the life you wished you did, but instead give them the right tools to choose and create a good life for themselves.

Reward and Punishment: Helpful or Hurtful

If you have not started the habit of rewarding with material prizes-don't!

A conception among some, parents and teachers alike, is that rewards and punishment can be useful and effective when trying to motivate a child to do a desired task, such as homework. However, pupils who are lured into doing something for a reward are less likely to do it again if no reward is given. Similarly, punishment or consequences often evokes in a child feeling of anger, defiance and a desire for revenge. This means that reward and punishment, even if it seems minor, could produce the opposite of the desired effect.

The most effective type of reward is giving praise. Praise that is effective because it refers directly to specific task performances, it is most effective because it emphasizes that success depends on the amount of effort one put in. Receiving praise and good feedback assists learners in evaluating themselves, helping them to create reachable goals. Once your child has established goals for homework or studying, they have already begun the process of becoming a self-regulated learner, or a child who has knowledge of effective learning strategies and how and when to use them. A parent's goal should be to help their child become a self-regulated learner.

Overall, rewards and punishments should be avoided if at all possible. They are quick fixes for parents who want to motivate their children to do well in school. In the long run, learners will be more motivated and eager to learn if their motivation is not determined by conditional extrinsic factors, but intrinsic ones. Using praise only when a child has done well. It is a mild form of reward that can teach that the amount of effort exerted and success are positively linked

Parenting for the new school year

Who wants to go from blissful summer holidays into stressful back-to-school mode? Surely no-one and to avoid this a simple bit of planning and thought can help.

With multiple children comes multiple schedules, bills and activities that require a master juggler to make it work.

To navigate the year ahead, have a year planner where all the different activities your children are involved in, the scheduled holidays and public holidays are mapped out. Be aware of your child's school timetable so that you are always aware of what is happening during the day. This is a great example to set for your children. Knowing what lies ahead will reduce stress because it allows you to plan and organize what is needed well in advance. It is also a good idea to display the year planner where all can see it so that you are all on the same page.

Budget is a serious consideration for most people and a set back-to-school and monthly school budget will encourage responsibility and saving in the family and give all of you a clear idea of what you can and cannot afford to do.

Then last but not least, talk to your children about responsibility, let them know exactly what you expect of them during the school year. Make sure children know they are responsible for their chores, completing homework and assignments, and remembering project dates. Together as a team, you will be able to have a stress free school year!

Tips on how as a parent , you can pepare your child for the school year

Taking time to talk with and listen to your child about the upcoming school year is one of the best ways as a parent that you can help your child with the transition back to school.

Pre-schoolers need to know what will happen

-As a parent you should take your child to visit the school and let them play and meet their new teachers.
-It's also a good idea to choose children's books about school life to help your child understand what to expect in school.
-You should establish routine bed and wake up times to prepare your child for their school schedule.

Primary school children will need to adjust to new beginnings

-You have to allow your child the freedom to buy something that they want, such as a trendy folder or pencil.
-Talk to your child about the new teachers he/she will have and the new freinds they will meet. The notion of a fresh start is usually appealing to children, and can help neutralize bad feelings about school.

Teenagers need positive reinforcement

-Help your teen set realistic goals on how to get better marks.
-Make sure that you help your teenager become organised by buying a daily planner and teaching them how to use it correctly.
-Encourage him/her to get involved in at least one extracurricular activity or sport because it will help them meet people.
-Try to convey a sense of optimism regarding the child's success because it enhances their motivation and sense of hope.

Understanding Depression

Research has shown that the highest risk of suicide and depression is the age group between 15 and 21 because there is a lot more pressure in this group. This includes pressure from peers to have boyfriends and girlfriends, to take drugs and alcohol, to be a certain type of person, as well as pressure from their families and schools to get good grades and meet expectations. All of this combined with the problems of adolescence and hormonal changes can contribute to a teenager feeling overwhelmed.

Symptoms of depression

• Feelings of helplessness and hopelessness. A bleak outlook—nothing will ever get better and there’s nothing you can do to improve your situation.
• Loss of interest in daily activities.  No interest in former hobbies, pastimes, social activities, or sex. You’ve lost your ability to feel joy and pleasure.
• Appetite or weight changes. Significant weight loss or weight gain—a change of more than 5% of body weight in a month.
• Sleep changes. Either insomnia, especially waking in the early hours of the morning, or oversleeping (also known as hypersomnia).
• Irritability or restlessness. Feeling agitated, restless, or on edge. Your tolerance level is low; everything and everyone gets on your nerves.
• Loss of energy. Feeling fatigued, sluggish, and physically drained. Your whole body may feel heavy, and even small tasks are exhausting or take longer to complete.
• Self-loathing. Strong feelings of worthlessness or guilt. You harshly criticize yourself for perceived faults and mistakes.
• Concentration problems. Trouble focusing, making decisions, or remembering things.
• Unexplained aches and pains. An increase in physical complaints such as headaches, back pain, aching muscles, and stomach pain.

Look after your children and support them where possible and necessary.